Life is bananas.
I flew home from a two-day work trip last night. I wrote the following in my journal on the plane. I usually don’t share my journal. Especially with my email list. But f*ck it. I am not the only one that has hard days.
Here is what I wrote…
A Coke Zero in a glass. How about that? Seat 1A.
Delicious.
I feel defeated from the past two days. More so today than yesterday. I didn’t add value and it scares me. I feel like I failed.
I don’t like this feeling. It is the first time I have felt this way with the new job. It worries me. What if I made a mistake? What if this is not my calling? What if I am dying a slow death of desperation?
More importantly, what if I never change?
That scares me the most. The idea I will always be this way. Broken. Lower than. Not smart.
I don’t like this feeling.
This is the first time I have sat in first class. It’s the seat and the glass from my vision. It feels close.
Today was a hard day.
As I was thinking about this on the plane I came across something interesting. A simple social media post talking about the rule of thirds.
Olympic athlete, poet, and filmmaker Alexi Pappas has a lesson called The Rule of Thirds.
One day she had a shitty practice training for the Rio Olympics. Defeated and down on herself, her coach (also an Olympian) told her not to worry, this was simply The Rule of Thirds. He said:
“When you're chasing a big goal, you're supposed to feel good a third of the time, okay a third of the time, and crappy a third of the time...and if the ratio is roughly in that range, then you're doing fine.”
I think I am doing fine.
Trey
You’re doing GREAT